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Revenge of the Clichéd Characters: Part One: The Quest
Part Two: Call
To Council Danger! Revisions can Cause Throbbing Headaches
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Revenge of the Fairies
Part One It was a dark, stormy night—yes, it really was! Lightning riddled the sky, each bright flash illuminating the hunting party as they made their way cautiously past row upon row of suburbia dwellings. The dwarf paused, scratching his chin through the thick weave of his braided whiskers. "How we supposed to find these naysayers?" He hefted his ax lengthwise across his shoulders and dangled his hands over each scarred end. He glared at the elf beside him. "Their huts all look the same!" Without taking her gaze from the rain-slicked road that stretched before them like an endless glistening snake, she said, "Our author will write it in. All we need do is wait." "Wait? Wait!" The dwarf growled. "Seems to me we do nothing but wait, I say 'tis time we take matters into our own hands. I say we terrorize this village and punish them all for their sacrilege." "Our task is set," the elf stated without emotion. "We are to find the naysayers and return them to the council. Their fate will be decided by all the enchanted creatures of the old world." "I say we get Talwyn to eat them and be done with it!" The elf smiled. "Aye, t'would be a most fitting end, I agree." The dwarf squinted into the darkness. "Where is that pesky dragon anyway?" "Talwyn waits on the edge of this world's dreams, ready to create the mist with her dragon's breath and open the portal back to our world." "I hope she hasn't been eating onions again," the dwarf mumbled. "I swear; the last time the stench was unbearable." "Come." The elf lifted her bow and nocked an arrow to its bowstring before she walked away. Her steps echoed hollowly into the shadow of the night. "I hear the tapping of the magical keys, our author wishes us to complete our quest. We must hurry before she gets distracted and leaves us in this cold world of iron and stone." "Ha, hurry is right." The dwarf swung his ax before him and smiled. "Last time she got distracted, I was the main dish at a gnome feast!" The elf chuckled. "At least she recalled where she left you." "Aye, there is that." The dwarf laughed. Once their author managed to keep her butt planted in her writing chair, the small hunting party's progress was swift. The elf, Shar-rhea-a, (the elf rolled her eyes and whispered to the dwarf, "She finally decides to name me!" "Hmm, I like it. Fits well with my own." "Gritchy?" The elf raised one pointed brow, but remained silent. Their author tapped harder on the keys, trying to keep the two from drifting away. Shar-rhea-a nodded. "Come, Gritchy, our prey is near. Once they are within our grasp, we shall return them to the enchanted world and allow the council to decide their fate." The elf sprinted ahead to disappear into the darkness leaving the dwarf behind. "I can hardly wait." He traced the pad of his fat thumb across the sharp edge of his ax and smiled. "Call me clichéd, will they!"
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