The Fractured Publisher

A Humorous Gallery of Press Releases

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Current Stories:

Reviewer Beware!

Life in the Shadows

 
Dragon Sighting!



 


 
Regular Columns:

Cliff Diving

Boxer Spotting

The Flaming Critic

 

 

 

 

   

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NEWSFLASH:
Dragon Sighting may Explain cult of naked women!

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Yes, I said naked women!

And that's all I can say because my managing editor says this is a PG website.

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(But if you're really curious, just check out Carol Hightshoe's reporting on the Dragon Sighting page!)


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WANTED

Lion Tamer

To trim indoor cat's claws. Cat has been known to shred the flesh of brawny adults when attempts were made to trim his claws. Applicant must have own tools, a good medical plan and a willingness to brave death.

 

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MISSING MUSE SOUGHT


SF/F writer Carol Hightshoe is looking for her missing muse. He normally answers to the name of Leathan and takes the shape of a large gray wolf who likes to nip at her ankles when she been playing too much EverQuest, Minesweeper or other similar computer games and not spending the time writing like she should. Recently, her muse has been taking the form of a slightly scruffy looking ranger from the north. Which, needless to say has proven to be a distraction in and of itself.

The other day, her muse was no longer scruffy looking and had a female elf with him - now both have vanished and she has been left without a muse.

Anyone knowing the location of Carol's muse or of another muse looking for an author should contact Carol immediately.


 

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Don't forget to Take the Fractured Publisher's Personality Quiz and find

out just how fractured you really are!!!
 


 

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We interrupt this news page for an important announcement.

The Fractured Publisher is in need of content. If you think you have what it takes to write warped and cracked prose while promoting your favorite e-books and small press authors, please check our Submissions Page.

Thank you...we now return you to the madness.

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NEWSFLASH:
Reviewer finds out just how dangerous it is to give a Harry Potter book a bad review! Read what happens when fans revolt!

Reviewer Beware!

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Wanted: Time

Author in need of time for sale. Hours, minutes or even mille-seconds. Top dollar paid

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Found: one overactive imagination. If you've lost one, PLEASE come get it! It's creating havoc with the rest of the staff. They say it's warping their own imaginations and their stories are becoming perverted.

 

PLEASE come claim this overactive imagination if it's yours because you can't envision what it's like living with a half dozen dragons who's stories are in a twist.

 

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Mysterious whisperings have been heard coming from the FantasyWriter's Motel. Author Sheri L. McGathy was overheard saying:
 

"I tell you right now,

Just so you know,

For the sake of my sanity

That dwarf's gotta go!"

 

Be sure to check back next issue of the Fractured Publisher as we try to discover the meaning of this cryptic threat.


 

 

   


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